5 Tasks for the Independent Toddler

It's 6:23 in the morning, just seven minutes before the alarm is set to go off, and your three-year-old tiptoes in and whispers into your ear, "it's day mommy!" No time to snooze, you pull yourself from the delectable sleep that had just been interrupted only two hours earlier from your hungry infant in the next room. You begin the morning rush (6:30 is never really early enough) and between breakfast, packing lunches, waking your oldest, nursing your youngest, packing the diaper bag, changing diapers, getting them dressed, getting yourself dressed, brushing teeth, letting the dog out, and if you're lucky a 5 second glance in the mirror, before you know it you're late. Again?! Shoes...where is her other shoe! Found it, you go to put them on her, and her sweet voice says the dreaded words, "no mommy, I want to do it by myself." 

It is insane the amount of patience required to sit and watch those little fingers slip and struggle while the time continues to tick by mercilessly. And I know the last thing we want to hear is one more person saying, "trust me, it's worth it." But let me tell you, it's really worth it!!

My just-turned-three year old is totally in this beginning independence phase and has been for a while now. But I also have an almost-five year old who, because of going through this phase herself, is an incredible helper. Not only can she put her shoes on without help, but she's fast! Harper can have her shoes on and walk to the car before I can even find Kinley's other shoe. And while I really don't have time to let Kinley master the art of Velcro when we're already ten minutes late, it's necessary. It's part of it, this endless task of helping them become them. 

So here are 5 tasks to give your toddler who has an ever increasing desire to become independent:

1. Getting dressed. Start with pajamas, when the only impending appointment is bedtime and the next episode of Parenthood. 

2. Sorting socks and underwear while you fold their clothes. The girls have two kid-sized recliners in our living room. I make a pile of socks and underwear, and I have Kinley separate socks in the left chair and underwear in the right chair. 

3. Putting their clean clothes away. This takes constant instruction on my part, but I hand her the shirt stack and tell her to put them in the middle drawer. Then when she comes back I hand her the pants and tell her they go in the bottom drawer, and so on. 

4. Sorting silverware. I have her put her forks and spoons in the container on the left, and Foster's baby spoons in the container on the right. 

5. Folding kitchen towels. Kinley loves folding. And what could be easier than tiny towels? Believe it or not, your toddler will surprise you at how fast he or she will learn this skill!

Of course you can do these things so much faster if you just do them yourself, and those towels aren't going to be in perfect squares, but that's okay. Really, it is! The value and self-worth they will feel is totally worth it. And before you know it, these days will be over, or so I've been told. And while this phase can be frustrating, there is a beauty to it, too...watching them grow. Soon those fingers won't be so little and clumsy, and I know I will look back on these years so fondly. In the meantime, while we're right here in the middle of it, the best we can do is embrace it with every ounce of patience we possess!